I have once again proven that water is an essential catalyst for most, if not all, interesting thoughts. While Stacey and I were washing the dishes and listening to the radio after dinner tonight, somehow our conversation wandered into the realm of solo artists. Specifically, the solo artists that were at one point in time in bands.
The song that sparked this discussion was "Plush" by Stone Temple Pilots. You remember them, right? Mid-nineties, top 40 rock stuff, along the same vein as Nirvana and Pearl Jam? The guys you don't hear about any more? Yea, those guys. Well, there's a reason you don't hear about them any more -- they have ceased to be. At least in that form. STP lead singer Scott Weiland stopped doing drugs, and from that moment on, in my humble opinion, STP started to go down-hill musically. The band split up, Robert and Dean DeLeo joined Richard Patrick (formerly of Nine Inch Nails and Filter) to form Army of Anyone, Scott did some solo stuff and sang for Velvet Revolver for a short time... but I digress. This isn't about the family tree of of the Seattle grunge scene . This is about folks who were in bands, then weren't. We came up with a handful. My request to you, faithful readers, is keep the list growing.
First off, there was every single Beatle. All of them. John, Paul, George, AND Ringo. Genesis had two solo branchers, Peter Gabriel and Phil Collins. Michael Jackson had a rediculously successful solo career post The Jackson Five, but we all know how THAT turned out. Beyoncé Knowles of Destiny's Child is still doing relatively well. Matchbox 20's Rob Thomas left the band and, fortunately, returned. I didn't like his solo work nearly as much. Pete Cetera (Yea, that's right, Pete. Not Peter. Pretentious douche.) did a handful of good things after his years with Chicago, but even so he's still more famous for his douets than his actual solo stuff I think.
That's all I have so far. Please, keep the list going. Include the artist, their former band, and which you like better.
Special thanks to Wikipedia for every single friggin' link. Even the self-referential one right there. w00t recursion!
11.12.2008
10.31.2008
Why the BlackBerry is made for men
I came to a realization the other day. It doesn't matter that my new BlackBerry is pink. It's made to be used by a man. And the reason why is all because of the holster it's designed to go in to.
First off: because I am a woman, I have hips. The holster is designed to be worn at the hip. The darned thing sticks out off my side like an abnormal growth! If I wear a coat over it, I feel like people are staring at the big lump on my side. No good.
Secondly: the holster really only stays on if you are wearing a belt. What if I am wearing women's pants that don't need a belt? The holster is going to flop over and not stay on very well. And forget it if I am wearing a skirt. Why bother?
Not like any of this will stop me from using my Crack... er I mean BlackBerry.
11.3.08, ETA: Here's another reason why the BlackBerry is made for men, which was indirectly supplied by a man. This morning I showed my BlackBerry to a male coworker who said, "How do you type on that thing with those fingernails of yours?" And honestly, it's not all that easy... and my nails aren't even that long... yet. :D
First off: because I am a woman, I have hips. The holster is designed to be worn at the hip. The darned thing sticks out off my side like an abnormal growth! If I wear a coat over it, I feel like people are staring at the big lump on my side. No good.
Secondly: the holster really only stays on if you are wearing a belt. What if I am wearing women's pants that don't need a belt? The holster is going to flop over and not stay on very well. And forget it if I am wearing a skirt. Why bother?
Not like any of this will stop me from using my Crack... er I mean BlackBerry.
11.3.08, ETA: Here's another reason why the BlackBerry is made for men, which was indirectly supplied by a man. This morning I showed my BlackBerry to a male coworker who said, "How do you type on that thing with those fingernails of yours?" And honestly, it's not all that easy... and my nails aren't even that long... yet. :D
10.23.2008
The Fine Art of Procrastinatoring
One of my favorite singers, Jamie Cullum, has a wonderful song aptly titled "Why Do Today What You Can Do Tomorrow":
Heaven sent, are days like these
Here with you, snoozing in the breeze
Tomorrow leads, today won't interest me
Today I'll be procrastinatory
There's a lot to be said about wasting your time
I don't really care as long as someday you're mine
I don't know what I want
But I wish I knew about love
Why do today what you can do tomorrow
Why do today what you can do tomorrow
So come with me and we'll waste a day
Somewhere warm, somewhere far away
So vote for me, it really isn't that complex
My politics are of laziness
There's alot to be said about wasting your time
I don't really care as long as someday you're mine
I don't know what I want
But I wish I knew about love
Why do today what you can do tomorrow
Why do today what you can do tomorrow
So come with me and we'll waste a day
Somewhere warm and somewhere far away
Why is it that procrastinating is so appealing? I don't think it's necessarily because we are lazy. Perhaps it is due to today's overdriven, overscheduled, get-it-now kind of culture. Somehow, even with the aid of such powerful technology at our fingertips, we're all busier than ever. And we need some kind of release from that... just put it all off, if only for a little while. Hence, doing nothing but watching marathons of House Hunters, playing with the Wii, or perhaps just staring blankly out the window.
I don't think I need to mention that the reason I am even writing this post to begin with is because I am procrastinating.
Heaven sent, are days like these
Here with you, snoozing in the breeze
Tomorrow leads, today won't interest me
Today I'll be procrastinatory
There's a lot to be said about wasting your time
I don't really care as long as someday you're mine
I don't know what I want
But I wish I knew about love
Why do today what you can do tomorrow
Why do today what you can do tomorrow
So come with me and we'll waste a day
Somewhere warm, somewhere far away
So vote for me, it really isn't that complex
My politics are of laziness
There's alot to be said about wasting your time
I don't really care as long as someday you're mine
I don't know what I want
But I wish I knew about love
Why do today what you can do tomorrow
Why do today what you can do tomorrow
So come with me and we'll waste a day
Somewhere warm and somewhere far away
Why is it that procrastinating is so appealing? I don't think it's necessarily because we are lazy. Perhaps it is due to today's overdriven, overscheduled, get-it-now kind of culture. Somehow, even with the aid of such powerful technology at our fingertips, we're all busier than ever. And we need some kind of release from that... just put it all off, if only for a little while. Hence, doing nothing but watching marathons of House Hunters, playing with the Wii, or perhaps just staring blankly out the window.
I don't think I need to mention that the reason I am even writing this post to begin with is because I am procrastinating.
10.17.2008
That's not democracy: Greenspan's two decades of steering federal monetary policy to the current financial crisis, and J. Edgar Hoover
Alan Greenspan, Federal Reserve chairman from 1987 to 2006 (fearless defender of wealth inequality and chief architect of the global finance meltdown of the late 2000s), is a symbol of plutocracy (rule by the rich).
Presidents are limited to serve eight years, and are (theoretically) elected every four. If chief lackey to billionaires, and economic overlord to the rest of us, can serve for nearly twenty, while the presidency shifts three times between the two (allegedly oppositional) parties, there's a problem with our democracy.
An even more frightening example is the top law enforcement officer, head of the Federal Bureau of Investigation. Someone needs to write an essay titled Did Democracy Exist in the United States in the 20th Century? The Case Against: J. Edgar Hoover. This mean-spirited director of the FBI from 1924 to 1972 (yes folks, you're reading that correctly, 48 years) was put in place by the despicable dean of domestic despotism, acclaimed liberal Democrat Woodrow Wilson.
Wilson brought us the Espionage and Sedition Acts, Palmer raids, overall criminalization of dissent (journals opposing the war not allowed in the U.S. mail), and imprisonment of dissenters, including socialist and labor leader Eugene V. Debs, who won 6 percent of the vote in the four-way 1912 presidential race. That election is another good example of the kind of democracy we have: Republicans would have won with Theodore Roosevelt, but they preferred to nominate Taft instead and kept him in the race knowing it would give Democratic candidate Wilson the presidency. (Wikipedia reminds that "William Howard Taft remains the only U.S. President to finish third in a bid for reelection to a second consecutive term.")
J. Edgar was A. Mitchell Palmer's protogé while, from mass raids in 1919 and 1920, 16,000 people were imprisoned, most of them without charge and of whom a few hundred eventually deported. Mr. Hoover maintained this damn-the-rights-of-those-who-would-propose-progress throughout the rest of his five decade career, although he clearly put his own political survival over Red Scare level repression all the time. After promotion by Woodrow Wilson, J. Edgar "no organized crime" Hoover stayed as director of the FBI through Republican presidents Warren G. Harding, Calvin Coolidge, and Herbert Hoover; Democratic presidents Franklin Delano Roosevelt and Harry Truman; Republican Dwight D. Eisenhower; Democrats John F. Kennedy and Lyndon B. Johnson; and Republican Richard M. Nixon.
Although certainly all the faces in government can change, and a system can still be fundamentally anti-democratic, forty-eight years for one person in one position of great power – moreover a person and position characterized by suppression of people opposed to the government – counts as a very clear symptom of a diseased democracy.
[Cross-posted at mlncn.com]
Presidents are limited to serve eight years, and are (theoretically) elected every four. If chief lackey to billionaires, and economic overlord to the rest of us, can serve for nearly twenty, while the presidency shifts three times between the two (allegedly oppositional) parties, there's a problem with our democracy.
An even more frightening example is the top law enforcement officer, head of the Federal Bureau of Investigation. Someone needs to write an essay titled Did Democracy Exist in the United States in the 20th Century? The Case Against: J. Edgar Hoover. This mean-spirited director of the FBI from 1924 to 1972 (yes folks, you're reading that correctly, 48 years) was put in place by the despicable dean of domestic despotism, acclaimed liberal Democrat Woodrow Wilson.
Wilson brought us the Espionage and Sedition Acts, Palmer raids, overall criminalization of dissent (journals opposing the war not allowed in the U.S. mail), and imprisonment of dissenters, including socialist and labor leader Eugene V. Debs, who won 6 percent of the vote in the four-way 1912 presidential race. That election is another good example of the kind of democracy we have: Republicans would have won with Theodore Roosevelt, but they preferred to nominate Taft instead and kept him in the race knowing it would give Democratic candidate Wilson the presidency. (Wikipedia reminds that "William Howard Taft remains the only U.S. President to finish third in a bid for reelection to a second consecutive term.")
J. Edgar was A. Mitchell Palmer's protogé while, from mass raids in 1919 and 1920, 16,000 people were imprisoned, most of them without charge and of whom a few hundred eventually deported. Mr. Hoover maintained this damn-the-rights-of-those-who-would-propose-progress throughout the rest of his five decade career, although he clearly put his own political survival over Red Scare level repression all the time. After promotion by Woodrow Wilson, J. Edgar "no organized crime" Hoover stayed as director of the FBI through Republican presidents Warren G. Harding, Calvin Coolidge, and Herbert Hoover; Democratic presidents Franklin Delano Roosevelt and Harry Truman; Republican Dwight D. Eisenhower; Democrats John F. Kennedy and Lyndon B. Johnson; and Republican Richard M. Nixon.
Although certainly all the faces in government can change, and a system can still be fundamentally anti-democratic, forty-eight years for one person in one position of great power – moreover a person and position characterized by suppression of people opposed to the government – counts as a very clear symptom of a diseased democracy.
Acknowledgements:
- ThirdCoastActivist.org for highlighting Greenspan's tenure.
- Background on the Red Scare for one of the few places where Woodrow Wilson's oppression is summarized.
- My father, for a visceral as well as an intellectual understanding of history and humanity.
[Cross-posted at mlncn.com]
9.28.2008
Review: Cirque du Soleil
On a rainy Friday night, I went in to downtown Boston with a group of friends to go see the latest flavor of Cirque du Soleil: KOOZA. Surprisingly (though maybe it shouldn't be), this circus is actually held in a tent - set up in the parking lot of the Bayside Expo Center.
The show has a very loose "story" line that I am just not cultured enough to understand. Something about a boy in striped pajamas who was flying a kite when all of a sudden an acrobat popped out of a box. Then there was something about a crown and a wand. There were lots of great songs and routines, then the boy gave up the crown and wand and all the performers went away.
Huh??
Besides the "story" line (or lack thereof), the show was quite enjoyable - everything you imagine Cirque to be, including crazy acrobats, tightrope walkers, trapeze artists, and a dude in a diaper climbing a stack of chairs 30 feet high (seriously!).
I commented to my sister on the way out that - as mean as this sounds - I saw more nets and safety wires than I had expected. Aren't these supposed to be the world's best acrobats? Can't they work without a net? Safety schmafety. (lol) Though I must admit, even with the safety nets, there were a few instances in the show where it looked like the performer almost lost it... again, surprising for the world's best acrobats... but certainly underlines the need for safety precautions.
Stacey's Rating: I give KOOZA four whole, unnibbled PORK Chops (on a scale of five). Definitely an entertaining evening, even if I didn't get the story part of it. I deducted one PORK Chop because of the poor location (even at 8:00 on a Friday, it took a long time to drive in), horrible parking situation (it took 45 minutes to get out of the parking lot), and high prices (we had "cheap seats" at the extreme left side of the U-shaped arena - some views obstructed with a pole - and it was still $45/ticket once convenience charges are added in).
The show has a very loose "story" line that I am just not cultured enough to understand. Something about a boy in striped pajamas who was flying a kite when all of a sudden an acrobat popped out of a box. Then there was something about a crown and a wand. There were lots of great songs and routines, then the boy gave up the crown and wand and all the performers went away.
Huh??
Besides the "story" line (or lack thereof), the show was quite enjoyable - everything you imagine Cirque to be, including crazy acrobats, tightrope walkers, trapeze artists, and a dude in a diaper climbing a stack of chairs 30 feet high (seriously!).
I commented to my sister on the way out that - as mean as this sounds - I saw more nets and safety wires than I had expected. Aren't these supposed to be the world's best acrobats? Can't they work without a net? Safety schmafety. (lol) Though I must admit, even with the safety nets, there were a few instances in the show where it looked like the performer almost lost it... again, surprising for the world's best acrobats... but certainly underlines the need for safety precautions.
Stacey's Rating: I give KOOZA four whole, unnibbled PORK Chops (on a scale of five). Definitely an entertaining evening, even if I didn't get the story part of it. I deducted one PORK Chop because of the poor location (even at 8:00 on a Friday, it took a long time to drive in), horrible parking situation (it took 45 minutes to get out of the parking lot), and high prices (we had "cheap seats" at the extreme left side of the U-shaped arena - some views obstructed with a pole - and it was still $45/ticket once convenience charges are added in).
9.26.2008
Movie Review: Sweeney Todd
Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street
Rated R (and with very good reason)
Be warned - there are some spoilers below.
My hubby and I 'rented' this movie by On Demand the other day. Before I even pressed Play, I had a basic idea of the premise: Johnny Depp, in a musical, playing a 'demon barber'? Pardon me while I laugh...
The movie on the whole is just dark and deranged. You get that sense in the very first scene. Benjamin Barker, soon to be called Sweeney Todd (Depp), is returning from overseas by ship, alongside a sweet-faced kid named Anthony (Jamie Campbell Bower). As they sail in to the harbor, Anthony is singing about how lovely and exciting London is... then Sweeney Todd cuts in and goes on about how London is actually a giant rat hole that chews you up and spits you out.
The first stop Mr Todd takes once on London shores is to a meat-pie shop owned by Mrs Lovett (Helena Bonham Carter); she openly admits (in probably the best song in the whole movie) that she in fact makes the worst pies in the entire city. We soon find out that the room above her shop used to be Barker's barber shop... abandoned since his wife died and his daughter Johanna (Jayne Wisener) was taken hostage by the just-completely-evil Judge Turpin (Alan Rickman)... and Mrs Lovett was kind enough to hide away Barker's valuable shaving razors. Ah, it all ties together so well!
The next part of the movie is fairly predictable: Anthony finds and instantly falls in love with Johanna; The Barber Formerly Known As Benjamin Barker rebuilds his business while seeking revenge on Judge Turpin (who is, for lack of a better term, a complete jacka**).
But then the movie takes a turn that is at once both hysterical and disgusting. Sweeney Todd murders a rival barber (Sacha Baron Cohen) who recognizes him from the past... and conveniently disposes of the body by giving it to Mrs Lovett to stuff in her pies. Before you can say 'cannabalism anyone?' Sweeney Todd is murdering clients left and right (he sets up a clever chair that tilts back to dump the bodies down a chute in to the basement), and Mrs Lovett's pie shop becomes an overnight sensation.
But there are still questions to be answered. Will Sweeney Todd ever have his revenge on Judge Turpin? Will Anthony be able to sweep Johanna off her feet? And will the fine folks of London ever realize what kind of meat really is in those pies? Well, I won't spoil it all for you. All I will say is that there is a crazy twist in the last 10 minutes of the movie that will leave you either totally satified OR wishing there was more... depending on how you liked the rest of the movie.
Stacey's Rating: I give this movie 3 whole pork chops and one partially nibbled one, for a total of 3.5/5 PORK Chops. It's definitely not a waste of time, but some parts may be too disgusting for squeamish folks like yours truly.
Rated R (and with very good reason)
Be warned - there are some spoilers below.
My hubby and I 'rented' this movie by On Demand the other day. Before I even pressed Play, I had a basic idea of the premise: Johnny Depp, in a musical, playing a 'demon barber'? Pardon me while I laugh...
The movie on the whole is just dark and deranged. You get that sense in the very first scene. Benjamin Barker, soon to be called Sweeney Todd (Depp), is returning from overseas by ship, alongside a sweet-faced kid named Anthony (Jamie Campbell Bower). As they sail in to the harbor, Anthony is singing about how lovely and exciting London is... then Sweeney Todd cuts in and goes on about how London is actually a giant rat hole that chews you up and spits you out.
The first stop Mr Todd takes once on London shores is to a meat-pie shop owned by Mrs Lovett (Helena Bonham Carter); she openly admits (in probably the best song in the whole movie) that she in fact makes the worst pies in the entire city. We soon find out that the room above her shop used to be Barker's barber shop... abandoned since his wife died and his daughter Johanna (Jayne Wisener) was taken hostage by the just-completely-evil Judge Turpin (Alan Rickman)... and Mrs Lovett was kind enough to hide away Barker's valuable shaving razors. Ah, it all ties together so well!
The next part of the movie is fairly predictable: Anthony finds and instantly falls in love with Johanna; The Barber Formerly Known As Benjamin Barker rebuilds his business while seeking revenge on Judge Turpin (who is, for lack of a better term, a complete jacka**).
But then the movie takes a turn that is at once both hysterical and disgusting. Sweeney Todd murders a rival barber (Sacha Baron Cohen) who recognizes him from the past... and conveniently disposes of the body by giving it to Mrs Lovett to stuff in her pies. Before you can say 'cannabalism anyone?' Sweeney Todd is murdering clients left and right (he sets up a clever chair that tilts back to dump the bodies down a chute in to the basement), and Mrs Lovett's pie shop becomes an overnight sensation.
But there are still questions to be answered. Will Sweeney Todd ever have his revenge on Judge Turpin? Will Anthony be able to sweep Johanna off her feet? And will the fine folks of London ever realize what kind of meat really is in those pies? Well, I won't spoil it all for you. All I will say is that there is a crazy twist in the last 10 minutes of the movie that will leave you either totally satified OR wishing there was more... depending on how you liked the rest of the movie.
Stacey's Rating: I give this movie 3 whole pork chops and one partially nibbled one, for a total of 3.5/5 PORK Chops. It's definitely not a waste of time, but some parts may be too disgusting for squeamish folks like yours truly.
9.25.2008
The Oink of a New Generation
Welcome to PORK 2.0! As you'll see in the "PORK History," this publication has had a long and rich history... well, maybe not so much. But my aspirations for "version 2.0" are much higher than for the print zine. I have the powers of TEH INTARWEBS on my side now! *insert evil laugh here*
What I envision for PORK is a place for multiple authors (err... my friends) to post articles about music, movies, books, hobbies, recipes, commentary on the news, etc... something that's both entertaining and useful.
Stay tuned to find out if we are indeed successful in this endeavor!
What I envision for PORK is a place for multiple authors (err... my friends) to post articles about music, movies, books, hobbies, recipes, commentary on the news, etc... something that's both entertaining and useful.
Stay tuned to find out if we are indeed successful in this endeavor!
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